Gao Xingjian (born 4 January, 1940) pictured above in a photograph by Olivier Roller
‘I have long tired of the struggles of the human world. In all the fine-sounding discussions, controversies and debates, I have invariably been made the topic, subjected to criticism, made to listen to instructions, made to wait for a verdict, and then waited in vain for some kindly divinity to intervene, to turn Heaven and Earth and get me out of my predicament. This divinity eventually emerged but wasn’t sympathetic and just looked somewhere else.
Everyone wants to be my teacher, my leader, my judge, my good doctor, my advisor, my referee, my elder, my minister, my critic, my guide, my acknowledged leader. Whether I need it or not, people want to be my saviour, my hit man (that is to say my hit-my-hand man), or else grandly represent my country for me when I don’t know what is country or whether or not I have a country. Others invariably represent me. And my friends, those who argue for me, that is to say are willing to argue in my defence, have all been reduced to circumstances similar to my own. Such is my fate.
I can’t play the tragic role of the defeated hero who fights against fate but I greatly revere those dauntless heroes who can charge into danger and when badly injured will still fight on. I can only silently extend my respect and grief to them.’
—from Soul Mountain (2000; translated from the Chinese by Mabel Lee)
